I hear this term used time and again in arguments between parents, family members, or friends who are looking for someone to blame for what is happening, or even as a way to blame themselves. People accuse each other of "enabling" without truly understanding what it is, or what the solution is. They just say it, and tell each other to stop doing it.
Most people accused of enabling behaviors are really just loving family members and friends who are being taken advantage of by an active addict. They're usually just trying to help. Offering encouragement, emotional support, financial support when needed, jobs with family members or friends, rides — the list goes on.
Read the rest of this chapter
Chapter 17 continues in the full book. Unlock all 38 chapters, audio narration, bookmarks, and notes.
Key ideas in this chapter
- Understanding true enabling versus loving support
- How tough love fails with addiction
- The extreme example of a mother administering heroin
- The splinter metaphor for family systems
- The grieving process families go through
"Addiction is an illness that does not respond to reason."